House Hunting in LA

My husband and I are looking to buy a house. This seems like an easy process. Problem is we live in Los Angeles and the homes are insanely priced. We have been looking for about 5 weeks and are getting somewhat antsy. We have looked at some beautiful homes that are way out of our price range. Some pretty homes that are in strange areas of the city. Then some crack houses that normally would be the perfect home for us except for the fact that it smells like someone died there. The crack house was listed at $580,000, we had to stop looking at open houses that day and shower.

How does a normal person living in Los Angeles buy a house? We have also looked at condos and found some great condos that are beautiful and in good areas, but still cost $400,000 - $700,000. I have also been obsessed with watching HGTV so I can get some tips for when we do buy a home. I have learned what to look for, what has value and how to decorate. It makes me laugh then want to cry when I watch these shows and the couple looking for a home is paying $200,000 for a huge house somewhere in America and I can't even afford to buy a crack house. I know, I'm the one that decided to live in LA, but it still doesn't make any sense that the real estate here is so much more expensive. At times the only thing I have going for me is I think of New York and the fact the real estate is even more there. Sorry NYers. I actually love NY and would live there, but my husband doesn't want to. We do go there quite a bit because his family lives in Manhattan. I love NY.

Ok, back to house hunting. My friend Leslie says "You'll know when you know." Which is exactly what I always heard about finding a husband. Actually, that sounds like I was searching for a husband, I wasn't, it just happened. So maybe that is the same mentality I should be using while trying to find a house. So here's to hoping that I'm going to become best friends with a house, then we will fall in love, and then I will get a $million mortgage and we will live happily ever after.

Well, here's hoping!

Therapy

I have anxiety. I get anxious when I drive, fly, eat, and watch scary movies. I have a tendency to get overly emotional about fictional situations. I self diagnosed myself with anxiety and maybe having a slight case of OCD.

I finally went to a therapist this year and he diagnosed me professionally with OCD and an acute Anxiety Disorder. Ironically, I am too anxious to take the meds he prescribed for me. Its been 4 months since I received them, I haven't taken one pill. In the session I didn't think I had much to say, but I ended up crying for two hours and telling him everything. And I mean everything! I told him how I ran away when I was 6 years old and hid under a banana plant at the end of our block, because I was too scared to cross the street. No one even knew I ran away. I actually ended up running away quite a few times and no one ever knew. Either I was really good at running away because no one noticed I was gone or I was really bad at running away because no one noticed I was gone.

No one noticing I was gone, now to me is scary. One of my biggest fears is to have someone kidnap me and hide me somewhere and no one notice that I am gone. This does happen. I watched a tv show the other day and this girl was kidnapped and kept in a box under this guy's bed for 7 years. She finally escaped. How do you come back from that? My husband assures me he would notice that I was missing. This helps a little bit.